The Coldest Winter Ever 21st Anniversary

Can you believe it’s been 21 years since the great Sister Souljah released her best selling book The Coldest Winter Ever? Even though it came out in 1999, it kept its relevance for….over 20 years. The GEN Zs are probably reading it even though they were barely born when the book came out or just babies when it did.

Sister Souljah wrote in the perspective of a spoiled, grimey, ratchet, hoodrich teenager who had her priorities ALL OUT OF ORDER–Winter Santiaga. She got her saddity ways by being the oldest and most spoiled daughter of a big time drug dealer. She was gifted with diamonds since the second she was born and every birthday until—shit hit the fan like it normally does. Her house was raided by the feds, her sisters had to go into foster care, her aunt sold her out to the Bureau of Child Welfare because she didn’t want to deal with her.

Winter’s goal is to get money so she can pay for a lawyer to help her dad AND to maintain her appearance because that’s all she cares about. But mainly she is a hustler and will cross anyone just to get ahead. Fast forward—-Winter has to stay in foster care and has to learn that she is no different than anyone else and she needs to humble herself. Of course, that didn’t adjust her attitude. Her close friends became her enemies because she only looks out for herself and she’s selfish. She stole from people who took her in and provided a roof over her head. She pretty much said forget her sisters who were in childcare and only focused on herself. She did get the chance to see her father before it would be a few years for her to see him again.

Winter starts dealing with an old boo thang who is a big timer and has money in his pockets. He was part of a crew who was an enemy to her dad’s crew at the time he got incarcerated. Per usual, Winter didn’t really care after a while because her father could no longer provide for her, her mother got addicted to drugs and her new man could provide for her–at a minimum. Once she thought everything was all good, it wasn’t. Winter’s boo had her on restrictions because he really couldn’t 100% trust her, (which makes sense). Once she started trusting him, things went array.

It took for Winter to get locked up in order for her to be humble. Per usual, she had a good hustle going on and the same friends she turned on are the same ones who were in prison with her, holding her down and she doing the same for them.

To me, this book is relevant after 21 years due to the fact that it addresses karma, real life situations, hustle and loyalty (or lack thereof):

Karma–> Winter stole from Sister Souljah and her house; her karma was leaving there broke because she tried to steal again. She also was disloyal to her best friend, who was boosting clothes for her. Once she got locked up, Winter didn’t want to help her nor bail her out.

Real-Life Situations–> Being in foster care, father is sent to prison, mother  on drugs, having to start from nothing and hustle to the top, plus a slew of other things

Hustle–> Winter had kept some of her clothes when the feds invaded her home. Once she was placed in foster, the kids there would get a weekly allowance plus whatever money they had from their part-time jobs. Winter would sell her styling services and let the girls there borrow her clothes.

Loyalty–>She had loyalty to her family. She was defending her mother when she knew she was on drugs. She was hustling to pay the lawyer for her father. That loyalty then turned to disloyalty when Winter started having a relationship with her father’s enemies. She also finds out that her father cheated on her mother and had an outside child, that’s when she lost all respect for him. She still kept him in her heart but she couldn’t deal with his infidelity so she decided to start screwing the enemy. Karma had a way of making it’s way back to Winter when the same guy left her hanging as she was getting jumped and had his drugs on her. He was also selling drugs to her mother. When Winter found out, she was disgusted—by her mom; she never address him nor her mother about it.

In conclusion, any pre-teen or teenager or grown ass woman can read this at point in life. It’s a timeless boo. Yes, it was based in the 90’s but the message still remains the same:

Be Loyal.

Be careful what you do because karma always catches up to you.

Remain humble.

“No Disrespect”—but….

Sister Souljah released her debut book “No Disrespect” in 1994 and it relates to women till this day and NOT in a good way.It’s titled No Disrespect but each chapter, someone is getting blatantly disrespected.Even when someone in the book is trying not to be disrespectful, they are being just that.

The book has seven parts about different individuals who have influenced “the character’s” life. The story is being told in first person so her name is never mentioned, so I’m going to refer to her as Character. Character has had different instances of dealing with men and that brought her to having high standards, to sharing with someone’s man. She’s seen her parents go from happy to divorce. Her father lost his job, then started having mental health issues, which led to the divorce. Her father would see her and her siblings every weekend to eventually not seeing them at all. Her mother and siblingsĀ  had to move into a low-income neighborhood where they depended on government assistance. Character saw her mother dealing with nothing-ass men just to get by and make ends meet and that brought on a bad perspective she started to see with men.

Character was always different and “enlightened” and as we say it these says “conscious.” She went to college, dated a guy and was even in a relationship with him, only to find out that he was secretly gay. That’s strike two of her bad encounters with men.

Character meets a friend who teaches her how to be throw herself out there to get what she wants–sexually. Character tried it and it didn’t work until, she met a guy a few years older than her. This man was married but she connected with him on an intellectual level and that’s what started her affair with him. She knew from the jump that he was taken but that didn’t stop her, of course the affair had to end because someone found out about it.

The next man that comes into Character’s life goes out of his way to make her his woman. He lied about his lifestyle and she accepted under the condition that he would stop. After dealing with the effects of his lifestyle and finding out he had a wife AND two kids, she was scarred by men internally and mentally and would never love the same again.

By the time character meets the last man in the book, she has the mentality that if her significant other is honest with her, she doesn’t care if there is another woman in the picture, as long as he keeps it real with her. She had came to the conclusion that there is a shortage of black men and black women would have to share regardless, whether they knew it or not so why not be honest from the jump? Men would cheat without us knowing anyhow so why not settle and have two or three women per one man. If that isn’t disrespectful then, I don’t know what is!! Yes Character really thought that would work out, until his girlfriend of almost 10 years said she wasn’t going for it and she wanted her man all to herself and she wasn’t sharing him. All in all, Character let the girlfriend have her man and left it alone.

So giving you that lengthy synopsis, in 2016 “some” women still have that same mindset of sharing a man. By sharing a man, some females are okay with being a side chick. You would never hear a woman say she is a man’s “other” girlfriend and actually being okay with it. So even if there is a shortage of men in the community society, whatever, we as women in general should never settle. Even IF in the end we are going to end up sharing a man because he would be unknowingly cheat on us but we the world wasn’t made for one man to have several women. I know in some countries and even different religions, men have multiple wife, but again that can be part of different religions and I don’t agree with and I guess that’s why I don’t practice it. The God I know made Adam and Eve, not Adam to have Eve and Eva ya know? Never settle, even if it takes forever to find the right one. Don’t be disrespectful.

Check out Sister Souljah’s book “No Disrespect.” It may be 14 years old but Sister has a way with words.